new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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