i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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