Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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