you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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