Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
