I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Randomize
