Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize