next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
