I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
