That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
