Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
