yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Randomize
