Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
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