the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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