talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
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