Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
