Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
