I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
