chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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