i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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