Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
