This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize