you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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