i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
the raccoons are back...
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