just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
