get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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