I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!