he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Randomize
