I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
