I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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