i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.