My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Randomize
