so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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