kristin has been a bad kristin
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
