In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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