Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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