Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
