He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
