I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
