you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
