do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
