sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
