I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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