Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
