im drinking this country out of the recession.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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