Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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