I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
