i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
