The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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