'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
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