the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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